Saving Grace

For many years we have celebrated Thanksgiving dinner at our house. We have loved hosting everyone and it has always been easier for Alex to be in his own environment.

For no real reason that I can remember, it became somewhat of a tradition for Alex to say grace before dinner. I think because he seemed to like to do it and for many years he was quite good at it. It was a great way for him to express himself in a social setting. In the earlier years, when he was about 8 or 9, he would begin by thanking everyone for coming and then thank God for the dinner and that was about it. We would all say “Amen” and smile and be so proud that he was even at the table with us as this was always a struggle.

By the time Alex turned 12, his grace had turned into more of a speech. He would again begin by thanking everyone for coming and then begin thanking God for numerous things and often go off on a tangent saying things like “it is sad for the turkey that was killed by the farmer. I hope he didn’t suffer a long drawn out death and let us pray that God is taking care of the turkey’s family.” By this time, someone, usually my mother, would interrupt and sternly say, “Thank you Alex that’s enough. Amen.”

In the last few years, the trend has seemed to be to turn to me to say grace and I think I know why. When Alex was 16, he said his last grace, although he may have sneaked a Christmas grace in a few times since then. We had all sat down to enjoy dinner when my dad said “okay Alex can you say grace?” Much to my mom’s annoyed look and reminder to “be appropriate.” Well this was an invitation, as it often is, for Alex to become creative.

“Dear God”, he began. “Thank you for this nice dinner. I pray for all my family to be healthy and happy. And I pray that I you will help me meet the beautiful Asian girl in my dreams soon so that I can have s…” “THANK YOU ALEX THAT IS ENOUGH. AMEN,” said my mother. Most of us were trying very hard to conceal the laughter with our faces buried in our napkins. “Sorry,” said Alex. “It won’t happen again.”

Thank you God for Alex and, when it happens again, please forgive me for laughing, again.

2 thoughts on “Saving Grace

  1. I can so relate! My son Zach has Asperger’s and also loves to make a speech. We were posted to England and were hosting a huge Thanksgiving dinner for all the Brits. Zach was 4 yrs old and was in the bath while I was getting dinner prepared. He discovered if he bounced his rubber ducky in a certain way something popped up. He called this new friend Founder (because he had “found” a new friend). We sat down to dinner and went around the table asking people what they were “Thankful” for. Zach stood up and proceeded to tell everyone how thankful he was for his new friend “Founder” and why! He is 21 yrs old now and everyone at that dinner just has to hear the word “Founder” to have a big laugh and a memory of the warmth of a gathering to celebrate our differences as cultures and as people. Grateful every day for the lessons my son has taught me.

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